One More Day

Waiting with my baited breath for 300 days
I never know just what I’m thinking
Holding on to leaving well enough alone
No matter what I think I’m leaving

I took my time and just enjoyed what I had
Never questioning what it was
But nothing lasts forever, they said
Though the memory certainly does
And as I close my eyes tonight
Those memories will hold me tight
And in the wake of all the change
The memories make it alright

I never meant to break this down
I meant
To see
If I could possibly not drown
If I could just hold on for now
To this
Belief
It doesn’t really matter how
I might make it through this

Enduring what I’ve built for myself to see
The constant sights to much to bare
Reality weighs heavy with its perfect irony
Right now it’s almost to much to care

Still I find the memory holding tight inside my mind
I feel like a king who’s lost his crown
Like the only thing left in my world to find
Is the one thing that I’ve lost now

So as I sit here with a drink
And let the memories sink in
I have to fight back from the brink
This can’t really be how it ends

I never meant to break this down
I meant
To see
If I could possibly not drown
If I could just hold on for now
To this
Belief
It doesn’t really matter how
I might make it through this

Can this really be
The way it falls out for me
Can this really seem
Like the better way for things to be
Is there a hope or prayer
Or a chance to change the way
If I could just go back
Just to have that one more day

Breath In, Breath Out

Breath in, Breath out
Til the silence is not so loud
One step, and one more
Til you find better reasons for

The fight, insane
And it’s only me to blame
For all, I’ve done
And I’ve only just begun

Fall in, get out
Of love before we drown
Once more, for show
Even though they can’t know

I can’t, forget
What it was that was said
Now when I’m, in doubt
I Breath in, Breath out

The Shadow Man

Faceless and nameless
the voices are shameless
they twist and contort me
and claim they are blameless
You hold on to tightly
they leave you and rightly
you know you can’t make it
you can’t even fight me
I try not to listen
to the constant admissions
but all that they say
is just part of the question
Can’t you hear what they’re thinking
they’re mocking they’re taking
their time and enjoying
how pathetic you’re being”
Breath in breath out
but don’t make a sound
the silence is heavy and sharp
but I’m bound
You know you can’t hide
we are always inside you
we are the only ones
holding you tonight”


Somehow they’re right
but still I fight
there has to be more
to this life than this strife

Green eyes don’t cry
smiling delight
see through the soul
they will haunt you for life

Green eyes don’t lie
open so wide
but don’t listen to close
or you’ll lose your mind

Green eyes burn bright
shining a light
constant companion
and only one left me tonight

Rave Explosions

I feel this deep and burning need
As I sit it builds inside of me

I hear a voice that calls my name
it says it’s time to take a chance again

I can’t resist this incredible pull
I’ll fill this need regardless of the rules

Can you hear the call in my blood tonight
Can you see the fire burning in my eyes

What will today be
Can I even contain myself
What all would I see
If I act when I can’t tell
Will they be beautifully ambrosian
Rave Explosions
Rave Explosions

I must ignore the questions in my mind
The questions dont mean much if we decide

So I’ll take one more deep breath
and jump into the oceans gentle depth

And when at last I reach this end
The fireworks light will show what will begin

Can you feel the power in the air
Can you taste the rush that’s drawing near

What will today be
Can I even contain myself
What all would I see
If I act when i cant tell

How long would I wait
to take another shot
There’s nothing to take
If I don’t give it all I’ve got
Are they beautifully ambrosian
Rave Explosions
The Rave Explosions
I won’t waste opportunity
I won’t wait and let it pass me
I’m determined that I will find
The truth that lies behind your midnight eyes

And we will see
Rave Explosions

Tell me What will today be

Rave Explosions

And then What all would I see

Rave Explosions

What could today be
And what all could I see
How long would I wait
No more hesitation til I get

Rave Explosions

In the Absence of Silence

Can I speak about the absence of silence
How the emptiness just seems so loud
When there’s no one around
And it’s just me I’ve found
That the screams and the laughs are profound

Can I tell you about what I’m hearing
What the faces without souls have said
When they tear through my head
All my thoughts held by thread
Believe me, you’d be better off dead

They joke and they mock and they shame them
The people we all know tell lies
Now the green eyes are leering
And her face is still screaming
And nothing is left to surprise

How strange, how strange
How the silence can go on for days
And the green eyes keep laughing
As their faces pass by me
And nothing is ever the same

They stare and they hover around me
And question everything you say
Don’t doubt I believe you
But the voices they see you
In new and impossible ways

And they come to me in all of my dreams
They rattle and prattle and shake
All I don’t know
They make sure to show
Me every last little mistake

How strange, how strange
The monsters seem so uncaged
But the green eyes keep laughing
And she just looks past me
And nothing can ever change

And they speak in perfect inflection
I hear every word that they say
They say “Always remember
They aren’t worth the fear
And you can only trust us anyways”

“Are we really so different
Deep down you don’t really think so
You’re here forever
Just like me you never
Get to be your own soul”

“And tell me you don’t see the truth here
It’s not like we’re so amiss
You think like I think
All the terrible dark things
You are why I can exist”

How strange, how strange
How the devil is so engaged
Perhaps you are just the
buried subconscious
of a mind that’s not gone where it needs

We do our best to ignore them
Despite their constant jeers
But we just can’t quite shake them
In the silence they’ve taken
They very best of all our years

Until there’s nothing left here

Until we aren’t worth all the tears

Underneath the Mask

This world is full of twisted fate
that burns and stabs and makes me ache
and fills my dark soul as I quake
in forbidden lust for thee

With every step and breath and thought
my mind goes where it ought not
and fills with glorious immoral rot
that’s taking hold of me

I can’t imagine any poison sweeter
then this dark and oozing ether
that rends my heart and soul beneath her
in the treachery I’ve sought

I hide behind a pleasant smile
my pulse racing all the while
for obscenity so rare and wild
and pray that I’m not caught

For my being is never more complete
then when I indulge the darkness sweet
and taste the blood that I do reap
in blissful misery

I reveal the tools once hidden
give in to impulse once forbidden
cross a line so far unwritten
in worship unto thee

I feel the sensation of falling
as across that line I’m crawling
ever near and so foreboding
in testaments I speak

Morals that I have forsaken
in my need for release taken
one with this my mind is breaking
and at last I’m free
to truly just be me